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Tuesday, September 14, 2010

"My bags are packed, I'm ready to go...."

Wait a minute!  Aren't those the words to a Peter, Paul and Mary song?
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fa3h3pnhg8s&feature=related
 And I've only packed one bag, not 'bags'.

I'll write this one last entry on the blog and then I'll brush my teeth and climb into bed.  I wonder how the night will go?  I've set it up to have a good night's sleep, so hopefully it will go well.

All of the the 'I'm really scared' feelings hit tonight.  Yes I am secure in the knowing that all will be well.  And, I'm scared.  Mostly, I think, I've been 'scared of being scared'.  I didn't know how I'd handle that.  But I'm finding that it's just like anything else.  I just have to take what comes, as it comes, and go with the flow, even if that means being scared for awhile.  I'll just be scared for as long as I am - Until I'm not.  It's probably just part of the process.

I love the words in the book of Eclesiastes in the Bible, talking about how (probably not exactly quoted), "To everything there is a season, and a purpose for everything under Heaven".  Well, I'd like to think that the purpose for Lacy showing up in my life was to save my life.  And, following the same train of thought, tonight must be the time to be scared for awhile.  How do I know?  Because I'm human, and it's happening. 

I wish I could share step by step more of the next 5-6 days, but the doctors and hospital will be keeping me busy.  Besides, I don't think they would think kindly of me saying something like, "Just a minute - I can't let you put me out for the surgery yet  I want to post to my blog first."  I don't think it works that way.

So, I'll 'see you' when I get back.  And Dorie and Marcia will be posting to keep you up on what's going on in the process.

The French have a wonderful word that has the meaning of something like "See you later."  There is not a word in English with a similar meaning.  So I'll borrow from the French.  Adieu, my dear ones, Adieu.

4 comments:

Pat Goodeill said...

Sweet Lady,

Thank you for your post regarding your fears. I never looked at it quite like that, but it makes total sense. You see there? Even at this time, you have inspired me.

Much love to you. Looking forward to the updates! Healing abounds! It is done!

AceofSpace said...

There is a sweetness, a sweet depth of sadness at the roots of fear, which has a deeply healing energy, a tonic of freedom from itself. It is the safest place to go rather than deepening and storing up more fear . . . you are as brave as your are strong and loving Gwyn.

My heart is with you
-Stace

Anonymous said...

I am thinking healing thoughts for you today and sending much love for a speedy recovery.

Joshua

Karena said...

Not that it matters terribly, but adieu means approximately "go with God." Au revoir means "at the return" literally or "see you later."

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